Whew, the study break is ending really fast..its already Thursday and I haven't gotten anything done yet!
Anyways, today was a fun day out! Wednesday me and Yman camped out at clubroom to do our papercrafting..I got a Nanibird and he did a Snake-inna-Box. Think the cost of production was even higher than buying ready-made materials! That night the guys watched Meet the Spartans down at the clubroom..and surprisingly it was good for a made-to-suck type of movie made by the same producers of Epic Movie.
Yup, today heaved myself off to school for camp finance meeting...seems like there's tons of things to be done for my budget proposal! I guess I've been stuck in too many of other people's projects that I'm losing focus on my very own role..
Anyways, after the meeting I headed down to Bugis to change book at kino. Thank goodness they didn't exercise their 7-days exchange policy! I was highly malu-ified when the lady asked for the date of purchase and I had to reply that it was the last day of the previous year. >_< Anyways, I learnt that venezia ice-cream had some cool-sounding tartufor flavour *the spelling gets more and more warped as time passes from moment of ingestion* Ohwell, it was a fun trip out from the monotony of school, really..its been pretty long since I've shopped out too.
Hahaa..thanks for the company out today, van! =] you're..not so evil le! =P
learning through life's potholes
i think i cleared up my head a lil'.
no time for distractions, this sem's crucial right now. can't lose what you don't have. why worry about status when its all about feeling. if it doesn't work out, there's no need to mourn any loss. no time for distractions, everyone. just relax and smell the roses.
*back to studies*
learning through life's potholes
in a weird, perverse way of thinking, is worrying over someone's unhappiness, being uncertain over one's response to your actions, having concerns for one's life more than your very own, and having sleepless nights just thinking of someone considered the thrills of dating...or is it just plain scary?
how quaint human relationships can get..i kinda think its scary though.
This is MADNESS!!!
learning through life's potholes
I'm just random these days, I wonder why. After watching Nobuta wo Produce, I just kinda wish I didn't go crazy during my JC days..or that I actually spent my 4years in a mixed school. It feels as if...something important was left out during my childhood, and I just can't figure out what. At times through the show it felt as if I were in Shuji's shoes, now and in JC, and now, I just feel what Akira would be feeling all over..sans the konkon.
Its been so long, I wonder..
Back before I entered university and after army, it didn't matter that I was alone. I spent nearly every day alone in my room, and I didn't mind it. I embraced it, and loved it. But, being alone now feels too lonely. I used to read books, and play my guitar just to waste such lonely times away. But now, it feels too lonely.
*total randomity - its' v-day, so let me indulge in abit of reflection.*
Its been so long, I wonder what it truly means to love someone. Do we guys really have the bravery, the selflessness to let the ones we love go with a better person? I cannot fathom the option at all. Going through that option once was already murder.
What does it truly mean to love..how do we know its not a fleeting sensation, or just wishful thinking?
I once thought I knew..
Back then, it was eating together, and having fun together.
It was seeing the same scenery together, and never forgetting that moment.
It was watching television, even when miles apart, and still laughing about it days later.
It was about laughing like crazy, or at times, getting worried sick over the person.
It was about wanting the best of the world for the person.
It was about wanting to take away all their tears, and leaving them all smiles.
And...it was thinking, hoping, and wanting to spend more time with them.
It was simple things like these, that I called love.
Now, it doesn't seem so easily defined. What truly defines the warm feeling toward another to be love, and not friendship? How do we stop the never-ending spiral towards this judgement with every bond we make?
Is it truly desperation, or do we really want to simply cheer up a friend when they're down? Extrapolate that: why do we selflessly proclaim to want nothing in return and stay by their side, cheering them up and lending a shoulder to lean on, when we wrestle the demons inside us, all goading us into wanting their acknowledgement and love in return?
I thought I knew the answers 2 years back.
Now I'm as clueless as the next single this Valentine's Day.
Until I know the answer, I fly solo.
learning through life's potholes
preparations for events are going on full-scale now..and fatigue's starting to set in.
i think, i just want to make her happy. truly, seeing her sad and tired just..doesn't feel right.I suppose I won't be as verbose as usual in the recent updates to come, cause there really ain't much to write on. Life's became quite rote: go for tutorials, copy tutorials, fall asleep at lectures, return to clubroom. the main perks now are probably..just dreaming i suppose.
and i think the feeling, though wanting to be her clown and protector, isn't right btwn us.right now, work's halfway done on the V-day video, and i wonder when it'll finally end..right now we're almost done with 2 chapters, but 2 more to go means a heck lot of time spent on filming.
i don't think she'll be interested in me, and i...truly treasure our friendship so much,not to forget, we have tons of mid-term tests coming up. its not funny acting the clown on camera all the time either.
i don't dare to even broach this topic. maybe i'm just being a coward, but is it even possible?also, engin awareness drive's just concluded, and the MC has engineered our baby RAG project, the E-box! Its our portable KTV Machine, complete with display, speakers, mike, and wheels! had quite a blast playing Jay's newest MVs down at LT6 back during the welfare giveaway, though I must admit being the emcee for that event was quite...lonely :P
right now, she seems so tired and stressed..i don't want to add to the troubles..yup, and not to forget, V-day's coming up, and tons of activities are headed to engin..theres' the bazaar with 30+ stalls coming in *phew!*, and theres' even a buffet event catered! of course, i can't believe the showing of the video >_< won't know where to hide my face when it really gets aired..
i just want to be there by her, when the going gets tough, to assure her when she's confused..
maybe, just maybe, truly loving someone doesn't really need one to possess the other..
learning through life's potholes